He’s appeared in ho-hum mainstream fare like “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button,” “Troy,” and “Meet Joe Black,” but it’s when Brad Pitt plays smaller roles that he’s able to really show off his acting chops—especially his impeccable comic timing (see this weekend’s #1 movie “Inglourious Basterds”). These 10 movies show that Pitt is a dangerous scene-stealing co-star, especially in quirkier material. Please enjoy my list of Brad Pitt’s Top 10 Supporting Performances. Click on the links to see video of each entry. If you have a list you’d like to contribute, email me at eric@scene-stealers.com.

10. Confessions of a Dangerous Mind (2002) Brad, Bachelor #1

In this Charlie Kaufman-penned directorial debut by George Clooney, Pitt cameos as a contestant named Brad on “The Dating Game,” alongside Matt Damon (who plays “Matt”). In the movie, Sam Rockwell portrays Chuck Barris, the creator of the show (and purportedly undercover CIA hitman) and the joke is that the slightly overweight dorky guy with the mustache wins the date over two superhunks because she can’t see them. There’s not much to the scene other than that one joke (which is why it’s at #10), but it just goes to show how synonymous Pitt is with good looks and how eager he is to lampoon that notion as much as possible. You’ll see how true that is when you get to the number-two entry on this list.

9. Snatch (2000) Mickey O’Neil

I’m not sure if it was a conscious choice to mock the bad reviews of his brogue in the standard and unremarkable Harrison Ford movie “The Devil’s Own,” but Pitt plays gypsy hustler-turned-bare-knuckle-fighter Mickey O’Neil with an Irish dialect that’s incomprehensible by just about every other person in this multi-character Guy Ritchie crime movie. The plot is pretty incomprehensible as well and uses a lot of Ritchie’s tricks from his previous “Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels,” but Pitt is hilarious, and sticks out the most in a movie so scuzzy and violent that dead bodies are fed to pigs.

8. Ocean’s Eleven (2001) Rusty Ryan

Pitt is the perfect comic foil to fast-talking Danny Ocean (George Clooney) in the first of three “Ocean’s” movies directed by Clooney pal Steven Soderbergh. Here Pitt takes advantage of his movie-star persona again, except this time he’s undercutting his handsome image and expensive wardrobe with a self-disparaging sense of humor and some pretty silly disguises. For someone who seems to have everything, Rusty has a problem holding on to money and he’s often seen eating something, although he rarely finishes. The “Ocean’s” series has resulted in to-be-expected diminishing returns, but Pitt’s witty banter with Clooney is always a highlight of each film. Here’s the scene where he and Clooney teach Topher “All Reds” Grace, Josh Jackson, and other young movie stars how to play poker.

7. Kalifornia (1993) Early Grayce

The premise sure is a lot of coincidence to accept, but Pitt still makes a memorable turn as a redneck parolee-turned-serial-killer who shares a cross country trip with an egghead grad student (David Duchovny) writing a book on … you guessed it … serial killers. While it’s somewhat of a crapshoot who is the lead character in this movie (like it is in the excellent “The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward John Ford,” where Pitt’s James is in the title—further blurring the lines is the fact that Casey Affleck got a supporting actor nod even though he’s in the movie more than Pitt), I’m sticking with Pitt as the supporting player because it’s his actions that cause Duchovny’s character to re-evaluate his obsession. Pitt uses his movie-star charm to generate a good amount of empathy despite the mounting body count, playing against type but to his strengths again.

6. Babel (2006) Richard Jones

A contrived-but-vigorous ensemble drama directed by Alejandro González Iñárritu with a multinational cast, “Babel” was nominated for seven Oscars, but Best Supporting Actor was not one of them. Pitt plays an older, well-off American family man on vacation and in a rough patch in his marriage when his wife (Cate Blanchett) is suddenly hit by a stray bullet. Pitt showed a powerful combination of entitlement and desperation that we’ve never seen from him before. His anguish and rage was potent, and it was believable across the board even if his particular storyline was not as compelling as other characters—two of which (Rinko Kikuchi and Adriana Barazza) received supporting actress nominations instead. Here’s the HD trailer.

5. True Romance (1993) Floyd

Smoking pot out of a makeshift plastic honey bear bong, in nothing more than a cameo, Pitt steals the movie from a huge cast of heavyweights (Gary Oldman, Chistopher Walken, Dennis Hopper, Samuel L. Jackson, Val Kilmer) as Floyd, the clueless but merry stoner who rats out his roomie Dick (Michael Rapaport). Perhaps this was a hint of “Basterds” to come, since Quentin Tarantino wrote this Tony Scott-directed film. (Too bad he didn’t direct “True Romance” as well.) When future “Soprano” James Gandolfini comes by looking for Christian Slater’s main character Clarence, Floyd delivers one of the most quotable lines of the film as only a man of wealth and taste could: “They were here and then they said they were going to go there. And then they went.”

4. 12 Monkeys (1995) Jeffrey Goines

His first Academy Award nomination (and a Golden Globe win) came for this Terry Gilliam-directed thriller, where Pitt plays mental patient Jeffrey Goines, who turns out to be of central interest to the film’s lead character (played by Bruce Willis). Since the movie takes place in a bleak post-apocalyptic future where everybody lives underground, Pitt provides some much-needed levity with his wild ravings and jumping about (which include a full moon). The film gets a little bogged down with its constant flow of red herrings and take-backs, but Pitt still stands out as something fresh (if not pretty hammy) in “12 Monkeys,” which is an expanded version of the far-superior 1962 French short “La Jetée.”

3. Thelma & Louise (1991) J.D.

This is the second Scott brother-directed film on the list, only it was Tony’s older brother Ridley who directed a young Pitt in his breakthrough performance as a handsome young drifter named J.D. Geena Davis and Susan Sarandon are the title characters who encounter rampant sexism and get in a heap of trouble at every turn. Davis, however, finally indulges her sexual side during a hot night in a hotel room with the muscle-bound and shirtless J.D. He may have turned out to be a bank robber and stolen all of the road-tripping couple’s cash, but Pitt made a wildly favorable impression on moviegoers (especially female ones) everywhere. This is the movie that officially launched his career.

2. Burn After Reading (2008) Chad Feldheimer

If you thought Floyd from “True Romance” was dumb, wait until you see Pitt portray sweetly deficient gym employee Chad in this wickedly black Coen brothers comedy. The real irony here is that the combination of he and Clooney really got butts in the seats to see this Debbie Downer of a movie. The ads featured Pitt acting zany, jumping up and down, and getting punched in the face, making the movie look like a nutty romp. But when dorky little Chad exits the premises very suddenly, this existentialist comedy takes some unpredictably nightmarish turns. Best line: “I’m sorry to call you at this late hour but I thought you might be worried … about the security … of your shit.” Check it out and other of Pitt’s best moments from the film edited together here.

1. Inglourious Basterds (2009) Lt. Aldo Raine

Maybe it’s a little early to call this one, but I’m still reeling from the many unexpected pleasures of Tarantino’s newest genre twister. The previews hinted at Pitt’s redneck accent, but his perma-smirk and the pure relish he takes in killing Nazis (rhymes with gnat-sees) can only be matched by his unwavering confidence. Also, I know what you’re thinking and I’m way ahead of you: Yes, his is the supporting role—I don’t care what the posters and ads are selling. This is really the story of “The Jew Hunter” Col. Hans Landa (Christoph Waltz, another scene-stealer) and Shosanna Dreyfus (Mélanie Laurent), the young Jewish girl he once let go. Lt. Raine and his basterds are outliers. Hell, Raine doesn’t even get to participate in the final shootout! But Pitt’s delivery and timing are so funny in this movie that he gets laughs sometimes just for a look. Pitt’s really at the top of his game these days taking these quirky little roles and I sure hope he continues in this vein because he’s producing some of his best work to date. Start at :43.

Tags: best, brad, characters, ever, films, list, movies, performances, pitt, roles, Supporting, ten, top, Top 10 Brad Pitt Supporting Performances

Today’s list comes to us from Sean O’Connell, a New York City-based writer who also has also contributed his Top 10 Movie Brothers and Top 10 Rain Scenes. Thanks to Sean for another great list! If you have a Top 10 you’d like to contribute, email me at eric@scene-stealers.com. Here’s Sean:

Every day I take the subway to work, it is usually an hour commute into Manhattan. There is always this married couple that gets to the station the same time as me and are on the train for a majority of my ride. They look like the perfect couple on the outside, but it turns out the husband is a real jerk. He always blames her if they missed the train, or if they are running late, or he does not have enough money on him to get on the train. As he consistently blames her for everything short of the demise of the economy, she just sits there and takes the verbal abuse. So listening to them fight over the last six months got me to thinking, there have also been a lot of horrible husbands portrayed on the big screen. I know there have been some awful wives in Hollywood as well, but I am keeping this list dedicated to the awful husbands. Some honorable mentions that did not make the cut, Michael Caine in “Hannah & Her Sisters” (he has an affair with his wife’s sister), Ray Liota in “Goodfellas” (he cheats on his wife throughout the whole movie), and John Cassavetes in “Rosemary’s Baby” (he whores his wife out to the devil). So without further ado, here are the Top 10 Worst Husbands in Movie History.

10. Roy Neary - Close Encounters of the Third Kind (1977)

I know right off the bat that many people will disagree with this one, but hear me out first. Forget the plot of the movie and just look at his actions. When we first see Roy Neary (Richard Dreyfuss), he is trying to teach his son how to do fractions. His wife Ronnie (Terry Garr) is cleaning the house trying to get her husband’s attention, while he just ignores her and gives one word answers to her questions. Then after Roy sees the UFOs, he wakes up his whole family to go see the site where he had his encounter. Ronnie does her best to believe him, and all she wants in return is to be held and kissed like they used to do. Roy, in turn, pretends to kiss her while still looking up in the sky. Then when Roy is promptly fired for not showing up to work, does he deal with this? No. He leaves it all up to Ronnie. Then when Ronnie feels it is time to have a serious talk about Roy’s insane behavior, she finds him in the shower fully clothed. At the end of the movie, everyone is always happy that Roy gets on the spaceship. I see it for what it is: He is running away from his responsibilities to his family. Instead of trying to go to counseling to try and save his marriage, he jumps on the first alien ship out of here. Spielberg was quoted years later as saying that you can tell he was single when he made this movie because now that he is a family man he would never have let Roy get on UFO and leave his family behind.

Worst Husband Moment: Roy’s attempt to save his marriage leads him to instead destroying his house by building an extra large model of Devil’s Tower in his living room. He uses garbage, dirt, mud, bushes, and chicken wire. This act is what ultimately chases Ronnie away.

9. Earl Hunterson - Waitress (2007)

The culprit in this movie is Earl Hunterson portrayed by Jeremy Sisto. Earl’s wife Jenna (Keri Russell) works as a waitress at the local diner where her specialty is making pies for any occasion. Really her pie making is an escape from the horrible marriage that she has gotten herself into. We find out Earl is bad news from the beginning of the movie because Jenna wants to hide her pregnancy from her husband. The last time I checked this is supposed to be a happy event. Anyway, Earl can always be heard coming in the scene because he beeps his car horn constantly when he picks Jenna up from work. One beep will do, but he has to be a jerk. He also takes all her money that she earned because a husband is in charge of the money in his eyes. Then when he finds the money Jenna had been hiding all around the house, money she was going to use to help her escape from him, he promptly flips out. He destroys a table at her best friend’s wedding, makes her come home, and then offers to buy a camcorder with the money so they can make sex films (that is if she can get back into shape after she has the baby). When Jenna finally gets the courage up to leave Earl, she goes to the bus stop. Earl beeps his way there, stops her before she gets on, and slaps her across the face. Striking a woman, let alone your pregnant wife, will instantly get you on the top 10.

Worst Husband Moment: When Earl finds out that Jenna is pregnant, he says she can only have the baby if she agrees to never love the baby more than him. WTF? How insecure can one person be? Well his reminder of the agreement after the birth of their daughter is what prompts Jenna to finally tell Earl to hit the bricks.

8. Monk - Purple Rose of Cairo (1985)

Next up on our list is Monk, played by Danny Aiello. Monk does not have much screen time in this movie but his actions as a husband have a significant impact on the movie. The wife here is Cecilia (Mia Farrow), who is a waitress in a local diner–wait, is there a trend here? Are all movie waitresses married to jerks? P.S. “Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore” doesn’t count because she wasn’t married to Harvey Keitel or Kris Kristofferson. So back to “Purple Rose,” after Cecilia works a hard day at the diner, she has to give her money to Monk who is out of work. Monk doesn’t pay bills with the money; he plays craps with his “friends” instead. By the way Monk is out of work and is playing craps when he is supposed to be out looking for a job. She tries many times to leave Monk but he always reminds her that she will be back because she has nowhere else to go. So the only escape she has from her awful marriage and constant beatings from her husband (we never see Monk hit her but he always reminds her that he will slap her silly again) is the movies. She goes everyday to see the same film, “The Purple Rose of Cairo.” Her devotion to the film leads to one of the characters stepping out of the film and insanity ensues. At the end though (SPOILER!), Cecilia does not get to run away to Hollywood with her new handsome actor boyfriend because he ditches her once the problems are solved. She is instead stuck in the movie theater again reminded that she has to go home to Monk because she has no other choices in life.

Worst Husband Moment: When Monk gets caught having an affair, he tries to convince Cecilia that it is her fault. He tells her he shouldn’t be left alone, that she should know how he gets when he drinks.

7. Prof. Humbert Humbert - Lolita (1962)

OK, the first three husbands were nothing compared to the next seven. “Lolita” … how do I even begin to explain how bad of a husband Humbert (James Mason) really is? For starters, he only marries Charlotte Hayes (Shelly Winters) so he can be closer to her underage (way underage) daughter Dolores (Lolita). Charlotte, who has no clue to what Humbert’s intentions are, sends Lolita away to summer camp. This makes Humbert depressed but he counts the days until she returns. When newlywed Humbert finds out that Charlotte plans to send Lolita to boarding school so that they can spend even more quiet time together, he becomes more withdrawn. Charlotte eventually finds his diary where he explains his ridiculous love for Lolita. This sends Charlotte into a frenzy and she wants Humbert out of the house, the great husband that Humbert is, he decides he is going to shoot Charlotte and make it look like a suicide. Well Charlotte beats him to the punch, while attempting to escape from Humbert she is hit by a car and dies. This news makes Humbert excited and he goes and gets drunk while taking a bath. Of course everyone just thinks that he is in denial. The rest of the movie just goes on to show that Humbert can also be a bad stepfather as well.

Worst Husband Moment: When Charlotte tries to seduce Humbert, the only way he can fulfill his husbandly duties is by staring at a framed picture of Lolita.

6. Ike Turner Sr. – What’s Love Got To Do With It (1993)

Good old Ike is the only real-life bad husband to make the list, but I’m sure there will be more to follow in the future years (the eventual O.J./Robert Blake/Jonathan Gosselin movie). Laurence Fishburne, who brilliantly portrayed Ike Turner, is the first of the movie husbands on this list to be nominated for an Academy Award. Ike is a selfish jerk of a husband who is jealous of his wife Tina’s (Angela Bassett) career. When they first meet, it seems like everything is going to be great between the two musicians, but we quickly get glimpses of the rage that lies beneath Ike Turner. Ike is constantly beating and berating Tina to the point that she doesn’t know if she is coming or going. He always reminds her that he MADE her, and that she would be nothing without him. Well, Tina eventually gets up the courage and decides to leave Ike, but the great man that he is, he decides that she can’t have her name; he thinks he owns it. Tina’s real name was Anna Mae Bullock and Ike felt the Turner name was his. He even says, “The name is mine. The name got my daddy’s blood on it. If she wanna go, she can go wherever she wanna go, but the name stays home!” What kind of a sick man thinks he owns a name? We all know that Tina gets her name in the end.

Worst Husband Moment: After a recording session, Ike throws everyone out of the studio. He then starts to hit Tina, and then rape her while screaming like an animal. Every time I watch this movie I find that this is the hardest scene to sit through.

5. Carlo Rizzi – The Godfather (1972)

Now, to be fair “The Godfather” has its share of bad husbands. Sonny Corleone cheating on his wife at his sister’s wedding and Michael Corleone lying right to his wife’s face at the end of the movie, but it is Carlo (Gianni Russo) who takes the prize. It starts out the way like many of the other bad movie marriages start where everything is great. Carlos and Connie (Talia Shire) have a storybook wedding that would make any couple blush. We eventually find out that Carlo only married Connie with dreams of one day joining the family business. When Sonny keeps shunning Carlo from family meetings, Carlo starts to take his frustrations out on Connie and ultimately decides to take matters in to his own hands. He makes a deal with two of the other rival mafia families to help take Sonny (James Caan) out. In order to achieve this, he must trick Sonny into one of his famous fits of rage. So Carlo decides to start going out all night, having affairs and having his mistress call the house looking for him. All of this makes Connie upset and forces her to confront Carlo. Carlo will not be confronted and decides to not once but twice beat his wife. Also, Carlo is the second husband on this list that hit his pregnant wife. Carlos is the first of our bad husbands who gets his in the end. Michael (Al Pacino) saw through Carlo’s little games and had him strangled on the day of his child’s christening.

Worse Husband Moment: The second time Carlo beats his wife, he first tells her to clean up all the dishes she broke. He then calls her a racial name and then chases her to the bathroom and beats her with his belt.

4. Martin Burney – Sleeping With The Enemy (1991)

First things first: By no means do I find this to be a good movie, but Martin Burney (Patrick Bergin) is one bad husband. The reason I felt compelled to put him up so high the list is because of what his wife Laura (Julia Roberts) planned to do just to get away from him. Here is a girl that knew divorce would not be enough, that he would always terrorize her. He was abusive, possessive, and got jealous when a neighbor would just say hi. So she decides she is going to fake her own death. Laura is petrified of the ocean and has never learned to swim. Martin convinces her to go out sailing with her one night. A storm comes and Laura is knocked overboard. Speaking of overboard, the husband in the 1987 classic comedy “Overboard” (Grant Stayton III, played by Edward Herrmann) was not so great himself. Anyway, so Martin is lead to believe his wife had drowned. End of marriage and Martin will be forced to move on. Well we find out that Laura had planned this night for months. She was taking swimming lessons so she would be able to swim to shore. She even faked her own mother’s death and moved her into a nursing home with a different name months before she faked her own death just so she could still visit her. When she did visit her blind mother, she went in disguise just in case. Now come on, all this planning instead of a divorce just to get away from one man? Martin deserves his spot at number four. Laura does get payback on her husband by shooting him twice in the chest.

Worst Husband Moment: When Martin finds his mother-in-law in the nursing home, he decides he is going to smother her with a pillow. Only because she said her daughter was married to a monster. Does that comment really condone being killed and how can you smother your blind mother-in-law with a pillow? Don’t worry, she doesn’t die.

3. Gregory Anton – Gaslight (1944)

Charles Boyer, who portrayed Gregory Anton, is the second husband on the list to be Oscar-nominated for his work. Gregory marries Paula (Ingrid Bergman), a woman who has been haunted by the death of her aunt years earlier in London. What does great new husband Gregory suggest she do in order for her to overcome her anxieties? Why, move into the very house that her Aunt died in of course. Paula agrees and soon she starts loosing small objects and hearing noises. When a watch that Gregory lost turns up in Paula pocketbook, he accuses her of stealing it–that’s classy. Poor Paula now starts to doubt her own sanity. It turns out that Gregory planted the watch there. Gregory was also hiding the small objects about the house and convincing her she was hearing noises. It turns out that Gregory’s master plan was to drive Paula crazy. Now that is what I call a wonderful husband. Bergman deservedly won the Academy Award that year for her amazing depiction of troubled Paula.

Worst Husband Moment: Gregory tells Paula that he is leaving every night, but instead he sneaks in the house through the attic. He turns down all the gaslights in the house the house so everything gets dim. Paula, since she is all alone and no one else experiences it, thinks that it is all her imagination.

2. Jerome “Jerry” Lundegaard – Fargo (1996)

The third of our Oscar nominated bad husbands is William H. Macy for his creepy performance as Jerry Lundegaard. From the opening scene we get a glimpse of just how wacked out Jerry is. He is sitting in a diner with two criminals, Carl and Gaear (Steve Buscemi and Peter Stormare), informing them of his plan on how he wants them to kidnap his wife Jean (Kristen Rudrud). His hopes are that he can then get the ransom money from his father-in-law and give the criminals $100,000 and keep the rest for himself to pay off his debts. This plan is so insane that even Carl and Gaear are confused by his motives and they tell him to simply ask his wife for the money. Jerry just can’t do that, so he would rather rely in two ex-cons he never met before to carry out his master plan. Needless to say, it all goes wrong, people are dying, and all wackiness ensues. Jerry starts lying to his father-in-law, trying to control the situation, just so he can get his money. When it looks like a legit business deal that Jerry has been working on might work out, he tries to cancel the kidnapping. When he finds out that he can’t stop it, he decides to just go along with it. Meanwhile, Jerry has a teenage son that is absolutely crushed by the disappearance of his mother. Jerry just tells him to keep on telling everyone mom is out of town. Jerry finds no remorse in his actions, and in no way comforts his son. (SPOILER!) Well, Jean is eventually murdered by mad man Gaear, and the police find Jerry hiding out in a motel trying to flee the scene. This all could have been avoided if Jerry just manned up and asked his wife for the money, but what do we expect from the number two bad husband in cinema history.

Worst Husband Moment: When Jerry finds out that Carl murdered Jean’s father, he decides to hide the body in the trunk of his car. This man would do anything to get his hands on the ransom money.

1. Jack Torrance – The Shining (1980)

Jack Nicholson takes the top prize on this list for his portrayal of the ax-wielding maniac husband from the Overlook Hotel. I know a lot of people are going to say that it was not his fault, that he had cabin fever. Really… I have been snowed in before to and I never felt the need to chop my family into bits. Then some might say, well he was possessed by the demons of the hotels past. The thing is, he was a jerk even before he got to the hotel. His loving wife Wendy (Shelly Duvall) looks like she is afraid of her own shadow because she was forced to deal with Jack’s alcoholic past. He even ripped their sons arm out of his socket because he messed up his test papers. So even before we know what makes Jack tick, it is clearly established that he is a bad husband. Jack, as selfish as he is, decides to drag Wendy and son Danny (Danny Lloyd) up to an isolated hotel for the winter just so he can finish writing his novel. Wendy, the good wife that she is, just wants to make him sandwiches and spend some quality time with him. Jack’s loving reply to Wendy’s actions is “When you come in here and you hear me typing, or whether you DON’T hear me typing, or whatever the FUCK you hear me doing; when I’m in here, it means that I am working, THAT means don’t come in. Now, do you think you can handle that?” Jack then tries to find out who beat up their son and when he finds who did it, does he reprimand the lady in room 237, NO- he kisses the witch. Then Jack decides that it is time to destroy the snowmobiles so his family can’t escape, he destroys the radio, and gets an ax to kill his family. Of course, his plan fails and Jack becomes a frozen statue for all to see in the Overlook Hotel’s glorious botanical maze.

Worst Husband Moment: Wendy finds out that Jack has not been writing a novel at all. Remember, that was the main reason he dragged her up to the middle of nowhere. He instead has been writing, “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy” over and over again. Jack finds her reading his “novel” and starts to pursue her up the stairs. He then threatens to bash Wendy’s brains in with a baseball bat. At least he calls Wendy the light of his life first.

Tags: 10, bad, characters, dumb, evil, film, husbands, list, men, movies, ten, top, Top 10 Worst Movie Husbands, Top Ten Worst Movie Husbands, Worst

Warren J. Cantrell’s Top 10 lists are becoming a regular feature here at Scene-Stealers. Cantrell’s unique voice has already given us Top 10 Reasons Why “Predator 2″ is the Best of the Franchise and Top 10 Movies Ruined by a Female Presence, so it’s only fitting that he follow those man-tastic lists up with a tribute to freakazoid actor Gary Busey. If you have a Top 10 list of your own you’d like to contribute, email me at eric@scene-stealers.com. Here’s Warren:

The quality of Gary Busey’s output has diminished over the years, but why shouldn’t it? Like any gladiator—any true warrior—there can be no indefinite prime. The slow and steady progression of age and insanity will take its toll on the best of us. Like Bill Paxton and Christopher Walken, Gary Busey is that most rare of commodities: the film equivalent of a relief pitcher that comes in to save either a worthy performance by others, or to salvage an already lost cause. To insert any of these three cinematic giants into a movie guarantees almost instant success either in the form of audience approval or ticket receipts (or both). Each of these three men simply cannot help but to make every film they appear in exponentially more awesome—their mere presence enough to assist a film’s transcendence from mediocre to almost-good. The films listed below properly utilized the volatile and unstable magnificence that is The Busey. The filmmakers of the movies below either found one of the maniac’s “good” days in their filming schedule, or let the ravenous man-boar off the chain and provided him space to tear the hell out of his scenes with impunity. Beyond these parameters, there really are no defining limitations to these picks. The entries listed are entirely subjective choices the author of this list felt properly showcased either The Busey’s extraordinary ability to curb his insanity long enough to get a scene in, or sufficiently brought in the man’s leash to get a stable, realistic performance out of the guy (an amazing feat all to itself, and quite worthy of recognition). Thus, I humbly give you the Top 10 Gary Busey Performances.

10. The Firm (1993), Eddie Lomax

You’re not going to find a lot of Tom Cruise vehicles on my lists (at least not in a complimentary fashion), so I feel a bit sheepish about throwing this one on here. Busey’s performance in this picture is really something to behold, however, and it is worth touching on if for no other reason than because G.B. is playing it largely straight, and does a damn fine job with his role. The Cruiser is out looking for some advice after learning that he might be working for a law firm that specializes in protecting mafia rackets, coming across a friend of his older brother from the good ol’ prison days. Playing a private detective, Busey does his part as a plot-filling stop-gap, inadvertently hooking T. Cruise up with Holly Hunter’s character, a partnership that will be mutually beneficial for both the characters involved and the twisted plot the film tries to cobble together from the ashes of Grisham’s novel. Though on screen for less than six minutes, Busey’s character performs his role as a script go-between splendidly, and even has one hell of a death to close out his final scene. Showing that though he can come to a movie with restraint and the crazy switch flipped off yet can’t leave without making at least one manly speech or stand, the film gives G.B. proper respect, allowing him to die with honor. Though shot to pieces in a torture interrogation scene in his own office, Busey gives a little back before getting the shit shot out of him. Plugging one of the hitters in the knee with a hidden desk-gun before getting blown all to hell, Busey goes down fighting and without revealing who it was that hired him to look into the firm (thus saving The Cruiser’s ass). Though a somewhat normal role without any wild-eyed screaming, Busey still turned in a performance that was as tough as it was gloriously efficient. Well done, sir.

9. Black Sheep (1996), Drake Sabitch

This one probably would have made it into a higher ranking on the list had the movie been anything except an unmitigated disaster not worthy of a middle-school sleepover party. Though amusing, “Tommy Boy” doesn’t exactly hold up as a benchmark in comedic cinema: What was once uproariously funny in the mid-90s is often lost in a future that’s seen far too many retreads and formulaic “got to raise money” SNL movie plots. “Black Sheep,” on the other hand, was a shameless cash-in which fooled nobody even at the time of its release, the vindictive aging process no less abusive in recent years. With the exception of Chris Farley’s “Kill Whitey!” speech near the end, the only salvageable pieces of this disaster are Busey’s scenes, every one of them ludicrous in ways only the master himself could manage. Like G.B. himself, his character in “Black Sheep” has no place in the functional world for he operates with no reason nor any discernible motivation. Though slightly provoked by David Spade, it’s clear that Drake Sabitch needs no cause to commence with a full-scale assault with all available weapons and resources for no other clearly defined reason than because Busey felt like kicking some ass. His character in this film is little more than a veiled artistic interpretation of Sir Gary himself: a man who wages psychological warfare on unsuspecting city folk (to him, that’s pretty much all of us) if only because it’s a job that needs to be done by somebody. Though this breed of crazy-character-acting has seen little reinvention over the last decade, people who cast Busey these days essentially looking for a slightly altered version of what appears here, give credit to the film that took this insanity and let The Busey run with it. Hence, as the mold was truly struck with this turn, it gets a nod.

8. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1998), Highway Patrolman

This one is such a small role, but it’s so important, it simply cannot be neglected. The scene is a classic example of the “don’t try this at home” insanity that the King of Gonzo passionately embraced. After bolting from a highway cop to give the two bored drivers something exciting to do in a lonely, desolate stretch of America, Raoul Duke (Johnny Depp) calmly whips his obscenely red convertible into a standstill to allow the custodian of justice ownership of the moment. In the novel, Dr. Thompson writes, “He will want the first word. Let him have it. His brain will be in turmoil: he may begin jabbering, or even pull his gun. Let him unwind; keep smiling. The idea is to show him that you were always in total control of yourself and your vehicle – while he lost control of everything.” Indeed, who better to play a slightly-off West-coast Super Trooper out of control than The Busey? After giving our hero a break for no apparent reason other than because he respects the journalist’s moxie (and his staggering collection of grapefruits and soap), the inevitable collapse in reality occurs: the patrolman asks Duke for a little kiss, as it is very lonely out there. Throwing a massive gulp of beer back in the subsequent cut scene, you got to figure he threw it Busey’s way, if only because no person on Earth can refuse the charms of so pure a creature.

7. Under Siege (1992), Commander Krill

The producers of this film gave as much to this effort as could be expected of any group of industry hacks, pairing the woefully under-achieving Steven Seagal with decent stock in a film that managed to be both entertaining and free of moral baggage. In Tommy Lee Jones and Gary Busey, the film got pleasant distractions from a headache-inducing Seagal, who can’t seem but to squint with furrowed brow in every single scene he’s in. Pug-face acting aside, the film does its best to keep the focus on what is most important: compound bone fractures and knife-murders. An obligatory titty-shot and helicopter demolition contribute to the effort, as does a submarine that appears halfway through the picture to create some sense of urgency, yet did little but confuse the targeted 13-year old audience with its spurious presence. The aquatic vessel did provide a spectacular death for our Mr. Busey, however, who through the course of the movie managed to kill his ship’s captain in cold blood, nearly drown the crew, commit high treason, and blackmail the U.S. government for the Presidency. As far as Busey films go, that’s a pretty full day, something that could only have been enhanced by a wicked backstory explaining the roots of Krill’s insanity. This was not a mistake made by the following film, however…

6. Surviving the Game (1994), Doc Hawkins

To do as much with this role in the time allotted to his character is a feat to behold with admiration: Busey’s turn as Doc Hawkins unquestionably one of the best in his storied career. It’s probably all for the best that he went down pretty quickly in this one, the colossal stature of Busey’s character almost too fantastic to capture properly on film. The story is simple: Ice-T is a homeless vagrant hired by a group of “businessmen” to act as a guide for a camping “expedition” deep into the wilderness, an expedition that actually specializes in taking bums into the woods to hunt for sport. Not only is Doc Hawkins the psychologist (hence the spiritual ring-leader) for a cadre of psychotic hobo-murderers, but once the hobo-chase is on it’s established that he hunts with a crossbow and Bowie knife. Jesus! Talk about hard! And that’s brushing aside the savage backstory the film gives us for his character—a monologue so brutal that the film’s plot halts completely to allow Busey about seven minutes to tell the tale. In sum, the film’s hero and the audience learn that as Doc Hawkins’ boyhood right of passage, his father made him raise a dog from puppy into adulthood, forcing the boy to murder the beast with his bare hands only after the child and dog had fully connected. Somehow, Ice-T is able to go to sleep after hearing this, and is (somehow) surprised to wake the next morning with a hand cannon in his face and a cabin full of maniacs foaming at the mouth in anticipation of his flaying. Busey is easily the most eager of the group, plowing through a plate of eggs only to be verbally restrained by the group who feel the good Doctor is too bloodthirsty even for their ranks. His death is no less fantastic: The semi-climactic hand-to-hand battle that ensues is the perfect ending to a glorious character. After taunting Ice-T for the better part of a century, Doc Hawkins is flipped wildly into a burning gasoline tinderbox pretty much right as it explodes. Yeah, that’s what I call giving proper respect to a man more than deserving of such an exit. The screenwriter later admitted he killed Busey too early! The film would be higher in ranking if it produced more of the good stuff, however, giving us a longer sip of magnificence like that provided by…

5. Point Break (1991), FBI Agent Pappas

Talk about giving a man some room to work. Busey is not only flanked by an appropriately awesome antagonist (The Swayze), but he’s paired with a young pre-”Speed” Keanu, thus allowing the film to operate in a way that sees the dynamic between each of the two fall at an equilibrium that has not been seen in a Reeves vehicle post-1995. Indeed, Busey can’t help but to steal the show from Keanu, an actor whose limited Hollywood cred at the time couldn’t even score him a plausible name in this piece of shit picture (Johnny Utah!). Though the film’s plot demands that most of the story concern itself with the budding romance between Keanu and Patrick Swayze…err, I mean, Lori Petty, Busey’s insanity repeatedly steals every frame of every shot of every scene he’s in. No matter what speech Busey’s giving, the same squinty-glared raspy intensity follows through the end of each sentence. Whether it’s laments over the hunger of a man willing to eat the ass out of a dead rhino, or speaking with nostalgic glee over simpler times when punks crapped on their hands and rubbed it in their face, the audience gets undiluted Busey the whole way through. His death in the movie is pretty goddamned outstanding as well, his bullet-riddled torso manly enough to shrug off an ass-load of hot lead for enough of a duration to put a pill in one of the baddies, taking one of the bank-robbing surfers straight to Hell with him. Busey finds the perfect groove in this picture, playing a law enforcement role with no less self-effacing hilarity than his turn in “Fear and Loathing.” Evidence? Consider that the FBI Agent he plays in this film green-lit an undercover surfing operation with a first-week rookie, drank Jack Daniel’s on the job, punched his supervisor in the face at a crime scene, and took the cuffs off a prisoner to get into a gunfight. If that’s not policing the Busey way, then I don’t know what is (nor do I wish to know).

4. The Buddy Holly Story (1978), Buddy Holly

Give credit to the film that turned the Busey loose on the world because it may not have introduced the man, but it certainly provided him one hell of a coming-out party. To watch this film now is to look at a completely different creature—one not warped by narcotics, alcohol, or extended bouts of insanity. This slender, fresh-faced kid walked into Buddy Holly’s shoes and never looked back, taking all the quiet Texas decency of the historical rock icon and infusing it with a subtle rebellious yet endearing slant. Yes, the historical record and the events in this film often don’t jive, but to harp on this too much would be to miss the point entirely, as this is a column extolling the cinematic virtues of one Mr. Gary Busey, and in this, his most (and only) Oscar-nominated performance, he does not disappoint. Not only does he play and sing the performed songs in the film himself, he and the filmmakers properly convey the most important thematic aspect of Buddy Holly’s career: social change. Buddy Holly not only blew the doors open for main stream rock n’ roll, pushing the new art form into a wider path of cultural circulation, but he also challenged established racial lines, as seen in the film by his performance at the Apollo Theatre and his marriage to a Puerto Rican woman. Both of these points are touched on in the film, and each lends weight to presenting a character that not only became famous as shit and died in an epic plane crash, but also, by all accounts, was a generous, caring, talented man with a hell of a lot to offer the world. Though The Busey went pretty well off the deep end in most subsequent outings, it’s worth it to remember what a diverse and promising actor the guy once was, and the true quality of talent that lies beneath the surface of a certifiable maniac. And while flying in a plane that runs into the side of a mountain is a pretty goddamned awesome death, it pales in comparison to his character’s demise in…

3. Predator 2 (1990), Peter Keyes

Though the two don’t share any real scenes together, that the filmmakers of this gem had the foresight to pair Busey with Bill Paxton demonstrates true commitment to the project. Playing a mysterious government operative trying to capture the Predator to usher in a new age of steel-net and shoulder-cannon warfare, Busey’s Peter Keyes runs head-long into the always solid D. Glove, whose Lt. Harrigan is so unapologetically no nonsense that not even the long shadow of Schwarzenegger could stand as the Lieutenant’s equal. Busey holds his own, however, seamlessly jumping between serious government double-talk to rebel-yell murder-acting, the breaks between these transitions sudden and magnificent. The result is a perfectly molded plot-repair whereby the audience can enjoy cheeky South Central L.A. space-carnage whilst confidently trusting that the picture provides some explanation of why the government isn’t getting in on some Predator-related research. Busey explains in his prequel re-cap and climax exposition speech that his team plans to freeze old pussy-face and take him back to the lab for a scientific prodding and poking session. As many of the films above have thoroughly showcased, however, when Busey’s characters take direct action, the initiative usually turns on him and the consequences tend to bring G.B. a quick—though often awesome—death. This movie doesn’t disappoint either, giving the audience not one, but two G.B. kills, as if the first one wasn’t properly Busey enough to warrant his exit. The second—complete—demise is more fitting a man of Busey’s stature. Talking shit right to the Predator’s face, screaming at the giant beast about his sorry space-assed inability to go home now that true men have his number, The Busey goes down hard, firing his freeze gun right up to the moment his body is cut directly in half. To even come close to this level of awesome, what with the pairing of Busey with Paxton and the screaming Predator-taunt death, one would have to turn to the man’s most frantic, drug-fueled, unhinged role—a movie that had everything, even a Baldwin…

2. D.C. Cab (1983), Dell

When I say that this film gives the world Gary Busey at his craziest, at his most randomly insane and unpredictable, I make a statement not only bold, but dangerous. If there is any doubt about which character in G.B.’s extensive catalog is the most uncontrollably frantic, I ask that you simply pop in this oft-overlooked 1983 treasure, and watch the evidence unfold. Honestly, I don’t even know where to start. In every scene where he appears, The Busey is not only speaking in the most hysterically frantic wheeze imaginable, but is spewing forth the most incomprehensible conspiracy babble that the most powdered of coke-heads could conjure. Whether it’s his assertion that Bruce Lee is not dead, but frozen and locked into an underground silo until the economy improves, or his assertion that he will, under no circumstances, work on Elvis’ birthday, the madness never stops. While I do enjoy his intense monologue near the end of the film about holding glass bottles next to his eyes after shaking the carbonated liquid within to unstable levels, how can you take that scene over, say, his attempt to woo Max Gail’s wife by telling her he’s come over with a bottle of Quervo Gold and his “lucky rubber”? To say a movie is awesome when it sports Mr. T, a Baldwin, Bill Maher, and Busey, is like commenting with shocked certainty that water is indeed wet. G.B. takes the opportunity to really stretch his legs, however, absolutely eating every other actor’s lunch when onscreen with them, running away with scenes at will and going so far over the top that even the characters in the film can’t help but to wince at the lunacy. His best line of this, or any of his films, though? Easy. “You wanna know what the worst part of oral sex is? The view!” Another gem:

Albert: “Do you do drugs, Dell?”
Dell: “I don’t remember!”

1. Lethal Weapon (1987), Mr. Joshua

Does it get any better than this? Just to make things fair, let’s discard the fact that Busey’s got maybe the coolest name in this film than any other character on his resume. Throughout the course of this movie, Busey’s so hard that he allows himself to be burned alive, rigs a house to blow, engages in some serious car-jacking, tortures the shit out of Mel Gibson in a way that could only make a Catholic happy, and gets into a goddamned mixed martial-arts brawl with a cop on another cop’s lawn surrounded by a whole bunch of other cops. Talk about balls! All you need to know about Mr. Joshua is in his profession: the trigger-man for a retired General/drug-lord who’s looking to carve out a violent corner of operations for his heroin-schemes, L.A.P.D. be damned. Mr. Joshua is not only able to outrun Mel Gibson, he calmly dispatches cops, kidnaps innocents, and tortures with ease. Giving the world its first taste of G.B. in a villain’s role, the film surprises and delights at every turn, showcasing a shockingly thin Busey easily navigating the waters of treachery like he was born for the task. Mr. Joshua not only outlives his boss and caretaker, but also gets the “Die Hard”-baddie treatment in his climactic gun-grab and dual-hero kill-shot. The performance is the most perfect mix of bag-lady level insanity with measured, restrained scenes in which G.B. is firmly established as crazy, yet in a way that provides the character, film, and actor some level of dignity. Though it would have been unthinkably awesome to thaw the blonde bastard out for one of the three subsequent sequels, the succinct clarity of the performance is one of its charms: a perfect moment in Busey-time captured for all eternity without any threat of tainting or bastardly re-invention. Mr. Joshua is the James Dean of Busey roles—that which is heartbreaking to lose, yet too grand to survive with dishonor into unavoidable disrepair.

Tags: 10, best, busey, characters, Crazy, film, films, gary, insane, movie, movies, performances, roles, ten, top, Top 10 Gary Busey Performances, weird

Top Ten Tuesday is here and so is the holiday season. But, as usual, we’ve got something a bit different for you. Christmas is such an emotional time of the year that it serves filmmakers well. Whether you’re celebrating the joy of Christmas or wallowing in self-pity at a holiday spent alone, there is so much already wrapped up (no pun intended) in this time of the year that it can echo the most excitement or the bluest melancholy in the wink of an eye. None of these films are considered Christmas movies, but each one of them features an important moment in the life of a character during that holiest of holidays. So grab some egg nog and enjoy this list of fantastic Christmas scenes! (Next week get ready for some more non-traditional Christmas fun.)

10. The Matador (2005)

Julian Noble (Pierce Brosnan) is a hitman having a hilariously petty midlife crisis. When he shows up at the house of businessman Danny Wright (Greg Kinnear) during Christmas to beg for his help, it is obvious Danny will take some convincing, so the slimy smooth-operator charms Danny’s wife with his inappropriate wit, and dances with her by the Christmas tree. This dark comedy has a lot to explain about Mexico City and what went on earlier that summer between the two, but one unexpected theme does come to light—welcoming an unwanted and desperate visitor into your home, even a sad little person like Brosnan’s mustachioed has-been. Writer/director Richard Shepard finds humor and pathos in the most peculiar places, and this is one peculiar movie worth checking out. Christmas time is the perfect setting to garner a little sympathy, even for a bastard like Julian.

Danny Wright: [discussing possible escape routes] That door over there, if it weren’t locked.
Julian Noble: A Vietnamese girl I once knew had her legs so locked together I couldn’t get a whiff of her spring roll. Two drinks, half a Quaalude later, I was at an all you can eat buffet. Every lock can be broken. It’s just a matter of will and whether it’s worth it.

9. Catch Me If You Can (2002)

Two key moments in Steven Spielberg’s breezy movie about young con artist Frank Abagnale, Jr. (Leonardo DiCaprio) who is pursued by determined FBI agent Carl Hanratty (Tom Hanks) take place on Christmas. The first happens when Frank calls Carl to apologize for fooling the lawman after a particularly close call. At first, Carl is annoyed. Realizing that its Christmas, however, the agent realizes Frank may be “living the life,” but a fugitive like him has no one to talk to on Christmas Day. The second Christmas moment comes late in the film, when the two meet again at a print shop in France, but this time Carl has the upper hand and fools Frank into coming outside by telling him that the police have the place surrounded when they haven’t even shown up yet. The film feels a little long, but the moments that work make for some spectacular entertainment.

Frank Abagnale, Jr.: Carl? Carl! Merry Christmas! How is it we’re always talking on Christmas, Carl? Every Christmas, I’m talking to you! [laughs]
Carl Hanratty: Put your shirt on, Frank. You’re under arrest.

8. Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life (1983)

When you die and go to Heaven, maybe it will be Christmas every day—where women wearing plastic breasts and dressed in sexy Santa outfits dance behind a gleaming-toothed lounge singer at an uber-cheesy Las Vegas-style show. The British comedy troupe’s last film together won the Grand Jury Prize at the 1983 Cannes International Film Festival, and the disturbingly funny song “Christmas in Heaven,” sung by Graham Chapman, is typical of the no-holds-barred kind of surrealist humor that the rest of the film exhibits. All the characters from earlier in the movie are seated in Heaven, watching in wonderment and awe at the monumental shininess of it all. Underscoring the uncomfortable feeling, Chapman’s lips and extravagantly white smile don’t quite seem to match up with the singing. If this is Heaven, I’d hate to see what Hell looks like. To hear the song, click here. 
To watch the scene, just click below and fast-forward to 1:50.

YouTube Direct Start video at 1:50 It’s Christmas in Heaven/ All the children sing/ It’s Christmas in Heaven/ Hark hark those church bells ring./ It’s Christmas in Heaven/ The snow falls from the sky/ But it’s nice and warm and everyone looks smart and wears a tie./ It’s Christmas in Heaven/ There’s great films on TV/ ‘The Sound of Music’ twice an hour/ And ‘Jaws’ I, II, and III.

7. Far From Heaven (2002)

Christmas parties have been known to bring out the best and worst in people. Giving a modern spin to the Douglas Sirk Technicolor weepies of the 1950s, this meticulous Todd Haynes film tackles homosexuality and racism more directly than the melodramas of that era were allowed. At a Christmas party, the first cracks in their flawless veneer start to show when Frank, the perfect husband (Dennis Quaid), is inebriated and belligerent while Cathy, the perfect housewife (Julianne Moore), is chastised by her neighbors for getting too friendly with her black gardener (Dennis Haysbert). On the outside, Mr. and Mrs. Magnatech (named after breadwinner Frank’s TV company) may be the model of affluent suburbia, but societal tragedy lurks just beneath the surface. Frank, it turns out, is a closeted homosexual, and after the party he drunkenly tries to make out with his wife. When he can’t do it, he repeatedly yells out in frustration, “Jesus!” Merry Christmas, indeed.

Stan Fine: [complimenting Cathy] Frank is the luckiest guy in town!
Frank Whitaker: It’s all smoke and mirrors, fellas. That’s all it is. You should see her without her face on.
Doreen: Frank!
Cathy Whitaker: No, he’s absolutely right. We ladies are never what we appear, and every girl has her secrets.

6. Goodfellas (1990) “Frosty the Snowman” by the Ronettes plays over a Christmas party celebrating the pre-dawn robbery at the Lufthansa cargo terminal at Idlewild (now JFK) Airport by Jimmy Conway (Robert DeNiro) and his group of wiseguys. But when the gangsters’ wives start showing up in mink coats and driving hot pink convertibles, they become obvious targets for the police, and he flies off the handle. It’s supposed to be a celebration, but already the walls are crumbling in Martin Scorsese’s 1990 gangster epic. “Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)” by Darlene Love plays at the house of Henry Hill (Ray Liotta), where his wife gets a wad of bills for Christmas, and his family enjoys a huge white artificial tree. The good cheer is short-lived. By 1980, it would be replaced by backstabbing and paranoia, as all of the divergent paths of Hill’s complicated Mafia career collide. Scorsese uses the season as foreshadowing in this scene, one of about a hundred virtuoso moments in a film that has found a huge and appreciative audience on home video.

Jimmy: Don’t buy anything. Don’t get anything. Nothing big. Didn’t you hear what I said? You’re going to get us all f–kin’ pinched, that’s why. What are you, stupid?

5. Citizen Kane (1941)

It is a small scene to be sure, but perhaps the most important one in unlocking the famous “Rosebud” mystery of Orson Welles’ masterpiece and one of the greatest films ever made. Sitting in front of the Christmas tree, 8 year-old Charles Foster Kane is given a sled by his new legal guardian, a bank manager in Chicago named Walter Parks Thatcher. The new sled is meant to replace the one he had in Colorado, back with his family. He offers a curt “Merry Christmas” back to Thatcher, and it is clear that this shiny new sled will never take the place of his cherished old one. It may be emblazoned with a medieval knight’s helmet and called the Crusader, but the new gift represents a kind of innocence lost for a young boy whose childhood was robbed. Welles’ movie is overflowing with a complicated, time-shifting narrative and other pioneering techniques that are still used today. If you’ve never seen it or haven’t seen it in a while, Christmas break is a great time to catch up with a classic.

Mr. Thatcher: Why, we’re going to have some fine times together, really we are, Charles. Now, shall we shake hands? [Charles pulls back] Oh, come, come, come, I’m not as frightening as all that, am I? Now, what do you say? Let’s shake.

4. American Psycho (2000)

If Mary Harron’s gruesomely funny movie is a searing indictment of 1980s greed and materialism, then guess what holiday is best suited to one of the funniest scenes in the film? If you said Christmas, then you’ve seen this classic moment (or perhaps the rest of this list.). Wearing furry antlers and sporting a Grinch-like frown, murderous yuppie Patrick Bateman (Christian Bale) is bored by all the festivities. He is all business as he scurries away from his cheery girlfriend Evelyn (Reese Witherspoon) and her Vietnamese pot-bellied pig to talk turkey with a rival. He is the anti-Christ(mas). The scene opens with Bale uttering the hollowest and flat holiday greeting ever: “Hey Hamilton, have a holly jolly Christmas. Is Allen still handling the Fisher account?” Actually, reading it really doesn’t do the scene justice. Why not watch it now?

Evelyn: Stop scowling Patrick, you’re such a Grinch. What does Mr. Grinch want for Christmas? And don’t say breast implants again.

YouTube Direct Patrick Bateman loves Christmas

3. The Apartment (1960)

In writer/director/producer Billy Wilder’s sophisticated and nuanced romantic comedy/drama, lonely salaryman Bud Baxter (Jack Lemmon) and cute elevator girl Fran Kubelik (Shirley MacLaine) share some time at an office party on Christmas Eve. Each of them thinks they are getting what they want for Christmas—him, a nice raise and some new respect; and her, a husband. But when Bud’s co-workers complain about how he got the promotion (letting his boss use his apartment for secret trysts with Miss Kubelik) and Fran finds out she is but one of many of the philandering Mr. Mandrake’s affairs, it turns into a bittersweet night. Bud ends up drinking alone at a bar, and Fran does something quite drastic. Wilder’s coup d’état came when he captured Best Picture, Director, and Screenplay wins for “The Apartment” at the Oscars in 1961, and deservedly so. It looks today as it did then—like a modern classic. Just look at this sparkling dialogue:

Bud: Well, as a matter of fact, I was rather hurt that night you stood me up.
Fran: I don’t blame you, it was unforgivable.
Bud: I forgive you.
Fran: Well, you shouldn’t.
Bud: You couldn’t help yourself. I mean, when you’re having a drink with one man, you can’t suddenly walk out on him because you’re having another date with another man. You did the only decent thing.
Fran: I wouldn’t be too sure. Just because I wear a uniform, that doesn’t make me a Girl Scout.
Bud: Miss Kubelik, one doesn’t get to be a second administrative assistant around here unless he’s a pretty good judge of character, and as far as I’m concerned, you’re tops, I mean, decency-wise, and otherwise-wise.

2. L.A. Confidential (1997)

Curtis Hanson’s masterful (and Oscar-winning) adaptation of a gripping, hard-boiled crime novel by James Ellroy opens with a fictionalized version of a true-life incident, one of the many blights on the Los Angeles Police Department in the 1950s. Up to fifty members of the force severely beat seven Latino men while they were in custody on Christmas Day 1951. “Bloody Christmas” was what the papers called the controversy, and in the movie, Guy Pearce’s by-the-rules detective Ed Exley is hated immediately by every cop in the building for testifying against the officers involved. It is a brutal opening to one of the best films of the last 25 years; a film that gets it all right—the decay and rot that ran rampant beneath the glitz and glamour of Hollywood. Hanson also deserves credit for breaking Pearce and Russell Crowe through to American audiences, and for using Dean Martin’s saucy rendition of “The Christmas Blues.”

Capt. Dudley Smith: I wouldn’t trade places with Edmund Exley right now for all the whisky in Ireland.

1. Smoke (1995)

Auggie Wren’s Christmas Story, a short story by Paul Auster that appeared in the New York Times on Christmas Day in 1990, led to this film collaboration with director Wayne Wang. Several stories are linked together by the colorful characters who shop at a Brooklyn cigar shop run by the ever-optimistic Auggie (Harvey Keitel). A frustrated writer (William Hurt), a doppelganger for Auster himself, learns to take the time to look at life differently after coincidences open him up to life-changing events. At one point in the film, Keitel sits Hurt down to tell him Auster’s Christmas story that appeared in the Times. It is the centerpiece of the movie and is a simple tale full of stealing, loneliness, and unexpected warmth. To read Keitel’s monologue from the film, click here. To hear Auster himself read the story and the circumstances surrounding it, click here. Listen now. Trust me, it’s worth it.…and have a Merry Christmas!

Auggie Wren: If you can’t share your secrets with your friends then what kind of friend are you?
Paul Benjamin: Exactly… life just wouldn’t be worth living.

Tags: 10, characters, christmas, films, moments, movie, movies, non-christmas, scenes, ten, top, Top 10 Defining Christmas Moments

Alright Scene-Stealers gang, before you get all twitchy, this is a favorites list - not a “best of” anything. This is a fluff list designed entirely to get our readers out there in internet land to fire back with your personal allhallows-eve movie costume faves or just the best idea for a costume yet unrealized. So friends, don’t be shy, tell us all about it. Links to related lists: Top 10 Scariest Movie Themes, Top 10 Overlooked Scary Movies, Top 10 Slapstick Horror Movies, Top 10 Giant Monster Attacks! Movies, Top 10 Movie Monsters

1. Costume: Members of Spinal Tap from “This is Spinal Tap” (1984)

A tried and true costume stand-by, the boys in the Tap are a Halloween goldmine. More times than not, bad English accents and all, a Spinal Tap costume is a hit - albeit potentially annoying. As you’ll see from the rest of my list, I’m a big proponent of ensemble Halloween costumes. This is a slippery slope, but you can’t go wrong rolling up to your local proper rock club talking about the “fine line between clever and stupid.”

Nigel Tufnel: This is my exact inner structure, done in a tee shirt. Exactly medically accurate. See?
Marty DiBergi: So in other words if we were to take all your flesh and blood…
Nigel Tufnel: Take them off. This is what you’d see.
Marty DiBergi: It wouldn’t be green though.

2. Costume: Members of Kiss from “Kiss Meets the Phantom of the Park” (1978)

The ultimate costume, period, is Kiss. Tribute bands live or die as much on the make-up and costumes as the classic tunes. Now of course I’m fudging things a little here, this is a terrible film, but who cares - it’s an excuse to get Kiss onto a Top 10 list. Sadly, I couldn’t find any sweet pics of the hard plastic Kiss masks of the late seventies, early eighties, but I think most people can appreciate a well done Kiss get-up when they see one. Turns out Ace may be a bit of a wanker in real life, but I’m always prepared to give extra props for rockin’ the Space Ace on Halloween.

Star Child: What do you compute, Space Ace?
Space Ace: Insufficient data at the moment, Star Child!

3. Costume: The Tennenbaums from “The Royal Tennenbaums” (2001)

Some unnamed friends of mine pulled this off so well at a Halloween party a few years back, I’m prepared to call it my favorite ensemble Halloween costume that I’ve ever seen. When Royal, Ritchie and Margot of the iconic Tenenbaums walked through he door everybody knew who was taking home the evening’s bragging rights. For you movie dads out there at a loss for inspiration, if you have two kids and three matching track suits, there’s some bragging rights to be had this for you this October. You just have to want it “Chas.”

Royal: I thought I’d start by taking you out to visit your grandmother.
Richie: God, I haven’t been out there in years.
Margot: I’ve never been at all. I was never invited.
Royal: Well she wasn’t your real grandmother, and I didn’t know how much interest you had. But you’re invited now!

4. Costume: A Shower from “Karate Kid” (1984)

Billy Zabka a.k.a. sweep the leg “Johnny” and the rest of his Cobra Kai hooligans rocked the skeleton hoodies in the original “Karate Kid,” but the truly innovative costume was Daniel-san’s identity-shielding shower guise. This requires a trip to the hardware store and a few extra bucks for the soap and towels.

Daniel: Oh, great, that solves everything for me. I’ll just go down to the school and straighten it out with the teacher, no problem.
Miyagi: Now use head for something other than target.
Daniel: Hey, I was just kidding about that.
Miyagi: Why kidding?
Daniel: Because I’d get killed if I go down there.
Miyagi: Get killed anyway.

5. Costume: V / Guy Fawkes from “V for Vendetta” (2005)

“V for Vendetta” is still one of my favorite films of the last five years, with its equal parts style and substance. The Guy Fawkes look is sufficiently creepy on its own, but add in some sweet moves and a cape and you have yourself a winner.

Evey Hammond: Remember, remember, the Fifth of November, the Gunpowder Treason and Plot. I know of no reason why the Gunpowder Treason should ever be forgot… But what of the man? I know his name was Guy Fawkes and I know, in 1605, he attempted to blow up the Houses of Parliament. But who was he really? What was he like? We are told to remember the idea, not the man, because a man can fail. He can be caught, he can be killed and forgotten, but 400 years later, an idea can still change the world.

6. Bob and Doug McKenzie from “The Adventures of Bob and Doug McKenzie: Strange Brew” (1983)

One of two Canadian options on my list for Halloween get-ups. The McKenzie Brothers isn’t an act that’s easy to keep up for an entire evening, but there is a sweet spot somewhere between the first Labatt’s and the “soakers” on down the line, aay!

Bob McKenzie: Fleshy-headed mutant. Are you friendly?
Doug McKenzie: No way, eh? Ra-… radiation has made… me an enemy of civilization.
Bob McKenzie: Alpha Base. This is Bob McKenzie. I have a fleshy-headed mutant in the Forbidden Zone.
Doug McKenzie: Ahhh! Take off, you hoser.

7. Costume: Lloyd Dobler from “Say Anything” (1989)

All you need is a trench-coat, some sweet sneakers and a vintage boom-box with Peter Gabriel’s “In Your Eyes” on repeat. Cameron Crowe’s brilliant “Say Anything” isn’t just one of John Cusack’s finer moments it’s also the template for a low-budget, high-impact crowd pleaser on the Halloween party circuit.

Lloyd Dobler: She’s gone. She gave me a pen. I gave her my heart, she gave me a pen.

Lloyd Dobler: “Maybe I didn’t really know you. Maybe you were just a mirage. Maybe the world is full of food and sex and spectacle and we’re all just hurling towards an apocalypse, in which case it’s not your fault. I’m been thinking about all these things and… you’re probably standing there monitoring. And one more thing - about the letter. Nuke it. Flame it. Destroy it. - It hurts me to know it’s out there. Later.”

8. Costume: Luke Skywalker from “Empire Strikes Back” (1980)

For a kid growing up in the 80’s, “Star Wars” was a full-time obsession from breakfast to sundown. In elementary school the guys all fought over who got to be Han Solo, but if you couldn’t be Han, then Luke would do just fine. This is the only costume on the list I’ve actually attempted to pull off post-adolescence . I can’t say it went all that well, but “Empire” Luke Skywalker hammered at a party is rather amusing, and I did get a nice blaster out of the deal, so either way I win! Bonus costume: For all the bald dudes looking for a home run this Halloween, go Lobot dude.

Han Solo: How are you feeling kid? You don’t look so bad to me. You look strong enough to pull the ears off a gundark.
Luke: Thanks to you.
Han Solo: That’s two you owe me kid.

9. Costume: The Hanson Brothers from “Slap Shot” (1977)

I would rather sit through a James Woods marathon than watch a hockey game, but for better or worse, 1977’s “Slap Shot” is a sports movie classic. The Hanson Brothers costume has a few simple requirements: 3 guys with unnecessarily large sports jerseys, longish hair, fake blood, thick glasses and you’re done. Oh, and at least one other person in the room who gets the reference.

Ned Braden: What are you doing?
Jeff Hanson: Puttin’ on the foil!
Steve Hanson: Every game!
Jack Hanson: Want some?

10. Costume: Melanie Daniels from “The Birds” (1963)

I recall being very impressed when someone told me about this creative movie-inspired costume before I saw it myself. An overcoat, some 60’s apparel, fake blood and a flurry of well placed homicidal birds, and your set for a Hitchcock Halloween. Of course, you could go for Hitchcock himself. You could make a cameo at every costume party in town.

Sebastian Sholes, fisherman in diner: Hell, maybe we’re all getting a little carried away with this. Admittedly a few birds did act strange, but that’s no reason to…
Melanie Daniels: I keep telling you, this isn’t ‘a few birds’! These are gulls, crows, swifts…!
Mrs. Bundy, elderly ornithologist: I have never known birds of different species to flock together. The very concept is unimaginable. Why, if that happened, we wouldn’t stand a chance! How could we possibly hope to fight them?

There you have it. Now it’s your turn. Tell us about your favorite movie-inspired Halloween costumes. With your help, Scene-Stealers could become the world’s leading supplier of Halloween costume ideas that simultaneously don’t suck, and can prove your movie prowess all at the same time.

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