This review of the “Fast Five” appears on KTKA-49.
Supposedly, the fifth movie in the “Fast and Furious” franchise—titled “Fast Five”—takes place before the third movie, but after the fourth. If that sounds like it’s going to make this a tricky film to follow, don’t worry—it’s not.
“Fast Five” is a dumb, ridiculous movie filled with enough tough-guy stares and male posturing to last you the entire summer. But it’s also high on extreme stunts and crazy car crashes, carried off with minimal aid from CGI, which is actually very refreshing.
The plot is “Ocean’s Eleven” rehashed—with Vin Diesel playing the Clooney role, but without all the snappy dialogue. Dwayne Johnson is added to the mix this time out, essentially playing the Tommy Lee Jones role from “The Fugitive.” In almost every single scene, he’s barking orders to federal agents with an absurd amount of confidence. He makes the most of it, but this particular action cliché has got to be stopped.
At 131 minutes, the movie’s too long, but if you can sit through the scenes where Vin Diesel utters a monotone sound bite and then stares at the camera for an extra second for resonance—the action scenes might be enough for you.
Eric is the Editor-in-Chief of Scene-Stealers.com and writes the Screen Stealers column for The Pitch. He’s President of the KCFCC, and drummer for The Dead Girls and Ultimate Fakebook. He is also Air Guitar World Champion Mean Melin. Eric goes to 11. Follow him at:
